Mr. Intentional- The MasterMind

Question does the road to fame and fortune
in the "mastermind" translation depend on the amount of people you
screw, let screw you, or get screwed by, determine how high you can climb?
If you ever fall off it'll feel like a plane crash... I'm just sayin.

Answer: The road to hell is paved with good intentions, of how they helped you out cause you"re such a hopeless victim. Yo don't do me any favors, Mr. Intentional.
Equivalent to climbing the Corporate Ladder it all depends on the amount of bullshit you will put up with. The higher you go the rules regarding harassment etc. etc., you will soon find out only apply to those at the bottom of the ladder. It's a tool to keep certain people down. Especially when they know your weakness. Hello????
That's just why I used to be like... Family Dollar Corporate Headquarters... Yall can kiss my ass... White dude using the married black man to harass me hoping I'd come to his office and report it. When that didn't work they went to another black man in a higher position etc etc etc. Then fucking Tallahassee wanna come at me with their bullshit and yall black man just sitting round like (duh duh) pimp my ride... Ride or Die it's all good. Damn man!!!
Let's not forget about Cigna Healthcare and their "mentoring program" child please they hooked me up with somebody in a higher position they wanted me to mentor... Get it... She was spose to be my mentor on a personal level (turn me out) and I was suppose to mentor her on the business etiquette side... I told them kiss my ass!!! LMAO Shall I keep going?

It's simple yet sad at the same time it's almost like some Corporate environments are institutions designed to draw people into this world of robots who do as they are told at the masters discretion. Based on your bullshit tolerance you are placed in groups just like animals in a zoo. Then you have supervisors monitoring and testing you. And if you want to get promoted you must pass the tests. Tests designed to go against certain peoples thought process. The people that can be distracted with money and cars. Sounds like the Public Education System.
Sad people have regrets.... If only I can see you more time and get another shot @ it. I swear now that I know I would say "can we talk?.".. Dude... Unwash your brain and do wut you got to do... You only live once... Stop letting massa dictate your every movement...
Black men "who says the man has his foot on your neck and won't let you move without being all up in your business"... Give his ass something to look at. Take my situation for example. All those white men telling the black guys not to date me talk to me etc. Check it I would have doing just what they do... Doing the opposite of what they told me and then when they asked I would have said no, it was somebody that looked like me... I would have been somewhere with that chic's legs in the air while whitey sending out a search party looking for her. Telling them "oh she over there", when she's sitting on my lap. Just like you don't know they don't know either but if you tell them then they'll know. That's just how I would have handled it. But I'm not a dude.

Mr. President, What have you done for me lately?

A friend of mine made this comment regarding our President Barack Obama and I quote "How can I say this here it goes WHITE POWER... And our president only looks black he works for them not us I've yet to see him do anything positive to help black folks answer that one." The mere fact that there are so many people especially minority men who feel the same way as the gentleman who made this comment.
Here is what I have to say to all of you who question what the President has done since he's been in office. Answer first and foremost you must lead by example. Black man, He that is greater in Him (the black man in our President) is greater than he which is confused by this world. Let me know if you need me to break that down Black Men.
You black men need to step up he is doing his job. Damn what do yall want him to hand deliver the damn message to yall. He has proven change is possible. So unwash your brains and accept the truth about you, black men. You are not who they want you to think you are.
It's a mindset these other people has instilled our people especially the "educated" ones. They're thinking somebody is out to take their place. When if their focus was doing their jobs they wouldn't have to worry about competing when doing the right thing. You see President Obama has been making major changes in the white house but it's the AMERICAN mindset that keeps us stuck on stupid and scared to move cause we think somebody finna steal what we got.
What don't you see? President Obama is mending relationships with countries we've been enemies or not so friendly with because of the mindset of former Presidents. He's made tremendous changes to our health care all while middle man companies continue to try to rob poor people and the elderly by spreading lies about their health plans. President Obama is holding companies like BP accountable for the "oil spill". He told them hey yall owe us an explanation for this crap. Splain us this. Follow him on Twitter @BarackObama and a lot of your questions will be answered.
This is what we all should know and understand we have the RIGHT to our own opinion as well as the right to express it in a way not trying to impose it on other's who think differently. But to express it freely because it's who you are. I can almost bet my life that if President Obama said "hey I will send out stimulus checks to all tax paying citizens who stand in front of their houses and do 25 jumping jacks for 10 days straight. Just go to this website once you have completed your jumping jack regimen and your check will be mailed to you". Yall would be running round here living right and jumping jacking yall asses off everyday until that check comes. Then once it's all said and done, you will go right back to questioning what is the President not doing for you. What in the hell are you doing for yourselves?

My Acceptance Speech

Arra Da Flygurl Simmons (Cristina Renee Hamilton Simmons)

Special shout out to the assholes @ Inspired Technologies that made this all possible!

I'd like to take a moment and stroll down memory lane and present to you the experiences, situations, and moments of pure entertainment I endured on my journey.

Well give props where they are do... I worked for a Information Technology company filled with employees from small towns and their minds matched the size of the towns they are from. So they thought they'd play a practical joke on me because they've never been anywhere and they think the entire country is ran by people with small town mindsets...
Their idea of fun was to watch me, my friends and family then try to ruin those ties and bonds. And then replacing them with evil little trolls that think like them. I remember one of the guys @ the IT company asking me how would I feel if I didn't talk to my friends of family anymore. I said "bring it on homey. Cuz check it if you got the power to ruin those relationships they weren't real to begin with". And don't think I am going to come running to you to make it all better. I was born by myself and I will leave here by myself all the shit that happens in between is what I make it. My story... Not yours. But small minds don't think like that. They are used to fickle and controllable minds with nothing but time on their hands.
It's crazy, sad thing is how they can poison the minds of EVERY body it's like they have outer body experiences and become other people. Trust me! If you can look through my eyes and see what I see daily, you'd think you were in another time and place. The master/slavery mindset has not changed. LMAO I remember after leaving this very IT company, in Tallahassee, they would send messages through my computer saying they were the master and I was the slave. All because they couldn't break me when I worked there. LMAO they were the Stupids and I had to show the world just how stupid they R.

I remember the first company I worked for in Tallahassee... I got "promoted" to the "assistant" to the owner of the company. I got this promotion because the workers on my level were having a hard time "figuring me out" so they thought the small town mindset slave owner would intimidate me. He used to try to program me into thinking "white" was supreme and that certain features on my body would let me pass as white. If I was willing to accept those terms and become a lower class white gurl who was to be used at his discretion I would have been alright. Tell me who wouldn't want to deny themselves and forget their own identity to become "right" in the sight of "white". Can you dig it? Get a degree yall this is what corporate america is looking for if you light and you can pass for white "U R In" and don't you go dating no black boys trying to increase the black population while working for him. He decides the type of women the black guys can date and it's usually the girls who are looking for a meal ticket or the girl the white boys have ran thru and now blacky you can have their left overs. Not the kid!

Didn't stop there... Because some of the white men who were after me are cocaine snorters they put me in work environments where people who did coke were in charge, white girls. Hoping I'd befriend them get hooked on coke and let it all hang out. LMAO at how stupid white men are, when that didn't work, they put me around gay black women. Hoping that ... they'd intimidate me and turn me out. Those bitches were intimidated. Then they put me in an environment where the white lady in charge was scared of the black girls working for her however she wanted to sleep with a black girl and she hope she could be the one to turn me out. Now she stayed out of the office as much as possible watching me on the computer hoping I'd try to hook up with one of the bisexual married women in the company and that's when she'd make her move. After using the other black manager who was a coke head as well. An older lady who they thought would replace my mom and I'd follow her into a world of coke and sexual "anything goes". For all of the time and effort I thank you. Stupid asses. Now who's the buffoon?

My Name is Not Susan

"There are some from every group of people here in the United States, who believes the world owes them something and they also believe they shouldn't have to work hard. Everyone needs to work hard at some point and get an education to better themselves". I agree with this to a certain extent, however, I believe there are some who would like to work but when people, such as the ones that I have come across, are owners of companies, bosses, judges, lawmakers etc. have a feeling of superiority that goes beyond the position they hold, they intentionally try to make it extremely difficult for those they believe to be beneath them or not worthy.

I had a white female supervisor who just would not leave me alone when working at this company. She would have people call my phone saying things like "oh Cristina needs to be working at McDonalds" just as the person on the other end of the line was saying this, my very insecure and immature supervisor would walk by my desk to see how I responded. She was testing me to see how far she could go. She didn't think I was smart enough to figure her out. She could never look me in the eye and I loved to talk her face to face and watch her tremble and shake. She would arrange team meetings then talk about how her parents couldn't afford to take her to the dentist when she was a young girl. I would sit there like "can somebody tell me what does that have to do with anything that we do here at this company". She would get sick when I would come to work dressed nice and walk by my desk and say "I'm sick I just can't take this" again I would look at her like "you're telling me this because?" I almost forgot that day she got sick because I came to work looking like I was about business and not about to sweep of the porch to my trailer. She had another supervisor holding her back like she was gonna pounce on me for coming to work dress like that. "The only this I wish I wish a Ni**a would"...."Black people don't come to work looking better than us". See why shit so messed up in Florida the damn white women in the Capital sitting around worried about who looks better than them and instead of them stepping their game up. They're trying to bring us down to their level. Kiss my ass.

She, like the man at the real estate company would use other white women in the company that were afraid of her, to come up to me and say real mean things about the black men in the company, black men in the city and black men in the public eye. She, like the other men would hide behind people that I befriended would have them say bad things about people with high positions in the company, just to see if I would engage and agree with what they were saying.

One day I was sick and I said to her I am pregnant, I was lying of course. She told me "get an abortion, I will approve the time off". I looked at her in amazement and thought these people are from another dimension. Because she was so nosey, I literally wanted to bust her in her shit every time she'd walk to my desk trying to see what I was wearing, what I was doing, what music I was listening to. I never understood why she didn't see that look of disgust on my face, you that look like somebody in the room just let out a silent but deadly; clear the room type of fart. That's how I felt when I looked in her face but wasn't nobody trying to give me time off for that shit. She, like the other men, would stand by my desk sniffing me. Yes the crazy bitch would sniff me. Sometimes I'd sit there like I hope her ass got a good whiff of that blunt I smoked before coming here so I can deal with her psycho ass. Maybe she'd get a contact and sit her ass down somewhere.

She would try her best to keep drama stirred up between me and other black girls in the company by spreading lies. She was very very ignorant in my opinion. She was in the process of planning her wedding when I first started the company and would try to through it in my face constantly like I really cared. I would just sit there like why doesn't she get it, I don't care. Bitch do I need to hire a pilot and have him write this shit in the sky.

The picture below shows the girl that started at this company a week after me. In this picture she is wearing a sweater like mine, she went out and brought a black car like the one I was driving, she even went out and got contact lenses to make her eyes lighter. She bought a house from the corrupt real estate company. Before doing so she went to live with a girl who I was friend with, her job was to break that friendship up. OMG after I stop working for the company she would come to my house daily thinking I was depressed I use to play the role so damn good, cause I knew she was running back telling her white Bosses. She would even come to my house and talk bad about them, again expecting that I would engage in conversation with her. Same ole game blah blah blah!! She even use to tell me she use to throw up to try to lose weight. She wanted to know what my secret on staying so slim was so she could tell the white lady "Massa".
My secret is this put down the fucking twinkies bitch!!!

Now back to Susan, she would pretend that we'd have such a heavy work load and ask people to come for over time on Saturdays while she sat at home monitoring our actions on our computers, and trying to control what we did on the weekends. One Saturday I was the only one there my son was across the street swimming so I figure hey lifeguards are here so I'll go work. Guess who comes in with a knee brace on, yup Susan then the bitch gone talk about "wanna see me belly dance" That was the funniest shit I felt like Jim Carrey in Liar Liar. You know how his secretary kept doing shit to try to impress him, the hairdo and the outfit. I also need to add this man they'd have bagel Wednesdays and because Susan wanted me to get fat because I was distracting the men in the company, even the gay ones (OKAAYYY); she would bring in cupcakes and shit thinking I was gonna be all cute and not eat em. Check it, by the time them munchies hit my ass. That was all she wrote and I use to wash it down with a pepsi and belch so damn loud. Hoping they would say EW!!! Dudes in the company use to stick their over into my cubicle like "yo Cris... that was you?" I'd respond with "xcuse me" in a tiny voice followed by a giggle. So my point is this as long as there are people like that who hold positions and try to use those positions to intimidate there will be people who want to work but can't because of the ignorance.

The picture above is how I look when I started working with Susan... Girl you betta watch wut you say!!

New AmERYKAH 101: Class is in Session

Look up in the sky it's a bird, its a plane. Yo didn't Biggie tell us "Ain't a damn thing change". Imma take it step further we've only just begun. L' Boogie said " rememba not a game nu unda da sun"! We can keep going back and forth talking in these rhymes, But if you ain't listening then this is just a waste of time! This lesson is really easy stop trying to make it hard, I'm tryna help you out, you know keep you from being "SCARRED"!

Enuff of that Ladies listen up! Which lesson is this anybody keeping count! I got Badu in the house (again) she gone tell yall what I think about what you're going through! You know those insecurities you dealing with cause your man "can't get right"! And you losing yourself trying to save him! Child please! Speak to em Badu!

Erykah Badu Booty

I keep trying to tell em, Badu but EVEREE day they ask for it!

This next selection is one of my personal favorites! Cause I keep telling these mugs "I don't want nobody next to me"! When I tried to be your friend your stupid asses was going home studying my myspace and my facebook looking for shit that you are insecure about hoping you'd find that insecurity in me! You mugs need to write Oprah, hurry up cause she about to wrap it up! Straight sick!

Window Seat: Erykah Badu featuring Questo and Rick Ross